New Levels of Communication with My Brothers

By |February 19th, 2016|Uncategorized|

One of my clients said it so well, I quoted him directly in this post: I realized in a Separation/Divorce Support Group facilitated by Coach Sherman Burns that I'd never really communicated with men, including my father, brother, and closest [...]

A Living Language

By |February 19th, 2016|Uncategorized|

A few men were lucky to grow up in families that weren't in an emotional ice age. For them feelings were a living language connecting them to other family members and letting them participate in each other's lives. For the [...]

Losing Friends

By |February 19th, 2016|Uncategorized|

As another unfortunate part of your separation be prepared to lose friends. In Burt Bacharach’s “Darkest Place”, Elvis Costello croons: “Meanwhile, all our friends must choose who they will favor, who they will lose.” Many people are unable to be [...]

Have Parenting Backups.

By |December 29th, 2015|Uncategorized|

There may be times you are unfit to parent – too stressed, tired out, what have you. My first wife and I separated when our daughter was two.  I was quite young but determined that I was going to be [...]

So Are You Really Separated?

By |December 29th, 2015|Uncategorized|

California - of course it all starts there - is putting in a new law that couples can't share the same residence and claim to be separated for the year they, and many other states, require before granting a divorce. [...]

Isn’t It Great?! We’re the Ones Who Are Good at Suicide.

By |December 29th, 2015|Uncategorized|

Women make four times the number of suicide attempts that men do, but men are four times as successful.  Separation and divorce can really exacerbate your problem, guys. Here are three things that make our grizzly statistics worse: 1) We [...]

Where the Divorce Rate is Falling

By |November 27th, 2015|Uncategorized|

Sometimes called silver or gray divorce, such separation is growing as the stigma of divorce is lifting even among older people. According to the National Center for Family and Marriage Research, those over 50 were twice as likely to divorce [...]

Home Free Pass

By |November 11th, 2015|Uncategorized|

Just like with a physical death, in the first year of separation you should be given a 'home free pass' to only be at 90%, or on some really bad days maybe down to 70%, of your usual competence. That is [...]

More on Friends

By |November 4th, 2015|Uncategorized|

When I start talking to guys about how important it is to have true friends at tough times, they often ask, how do I know if I have a true friend.   Finally! an easy question. Here is the simple [...]

Transitional relationships

By |October 26th, 2015|Uncategorized|

Transitional relationships: Definition: Those relationships which quickly follow a marriage or long relationship. Their purpose (often misunderstood) is to help a guy get back in the swing of things, realize all women are not the enemy, and experience again his [...]

Load More Posts